A Conversation with Michelle Passoff

THE THREE PRINCIPLES OF CLUTTER CLEANING

· Slow yourself down long enough to apply thoughtful consideration to each and every item. Handle one item at a time.

· Put like kinds of things together.

· Leave no stone unturned.

You will know that you have reached "ground zero" when each and every thing in your environment is there because you consciously and purposely put it there, and it's in support of your aims in life.

The Monthly Aspectarian: Your company, Michelle, is called Lighten Up! Free Yourself From Clutter and enables people to free themselves from clutter. Just what is it that you do for folks?

Michelle Passoff: The goal of Lighten Up! is to clear paths to having more, not less, of what you want in life. This includes in the physical sense -- having more of the things that nurture and support you. But it's not just in terms of things . . . it's in terms of the quality of your life as well. Lighten Up! is a service with a base in my home town of New York City, and I provide private consultation, seminars and workshops nationally. I also have an audio tape which gives people new perspectives, teaches them new skills and shows them how to integrate the principles we teach into their everyday life in such a way that they're not only neat and tidy -- which is a benefit -- but they're reaching the goal of cleaning clutter from their life. A year from now, another book of mine is going to be available that will show people they can actually find clutter cleaning to be empowering rather than an obstruction that's in the way of moving forward in their lives.

TMA: I'm one of those who can experience a great deal of inertia when it comes to taking on projects of cleaning things out and throwing things away, getting rid of things.

MP: It's that way for a lot of people, and that's why they don't do it. People who come to me are really ready to have it be another kind of experience. The first myth I like to dispel with people is that there is ever an end to clutter. As far as I can tell, the mail is going to keep coming, you're going to want to subscribe to magazines, you're going to go to a convention and pick up papers. You know, papers are a fact of life, your clothes are a fact of life. Stuff is a fact of your life; it's the physical environment in which you live. And as long as you're living, it's not going anywhere. Instead, the idea is to have power with it rather than to have it drive you into unconscious states. You use it pro-actively.

I say that working your way through it can actually be consciousness raising. So the first shift that takes place is in relation to the physical environment, rather than relating to it like it's a bother and an annoyance. The last thing on your list to shift that frame of thinking is to actually see how you can use it as a life management tool. Then it actually begins to gain a lot of interest. Rather than avoiding it, you can actually seek it as a way to open space for yourself. Then when you get to see that your life is more effective and productive and spontaneous and creative, and you have more piece of mind, you'll be looking for the clutter rather than avoiding it. Like, if that's what life has to offer, how can I have more of it? So the first thing that needs to happen is to look at it differently. A new perspective on clutter rather than what you've previously had that might not keep you interested in it.

TMA: I think one of the things you're saying is go ahead and clean it up in a conscious way, before it just gets to be such a pile that you just throw it all away without even looking at it.

MP: That would be unconscious. For me, it's off limits to burn or blindly toss stuff. The way to the other side of it is to move through it in a very conscious, step by step way.

TMA: So I shouldn't take a snow shovel into my office and --

[laughter]

MP: Unless it's snow, no. I'd recommend getting the snow out of your office, but unless it's snow, I wouldn't toss things blindly, no.

TMA: It can be real difficult to discard things. They're your things. What about the attachment people have to their clutter?

MP: Well, rather than being attached to clutter, I recommend being focused on a goal; to have aims in your life. What are you aiming at? I'll describe this with the way I end up filing papers. Instead of doing an A to Z file system, I break down the general aspects of most peoples lives, which are financial, professional, personal, and then names, numbers, and addresses . . . the whole category of relationship. If you take a look at each one of those areas and begin to clarify what your aim is, what you're aiming at, either in the long term or at least in the next six months or a year . . . what are you aiming at in terms of forward movement in your life in each of those areas? Then as you go to work on the clutter one item at a time, you begin to construct an environment that will be compelling you toward fulfilling your aim rather than obstructing you.

TMA: You mentioned that there's clutter in all areas of life, not just the junk on your desk or on your closet floor.

MP: Paper and clothes are the two most common forms of clutter, and once you can apply the principles and techniques and perspectives that I have to offer in these two most common forms of clutter, then you can become more creative and improvisational in getting rid of all kinds of other. Like there's junky, bulky furniture that might be clutter. There's equipment and appliances that are either unused, outdated or broken. There's kid stuff and stuff you inherit from somebody who might be deceased. There might be valuable things that you bought that you no longer want. All those things can be clutter if they're not there on purpose for the fulfillment of your life.

TMA: But gee, you might need that Cuisinart someday.

MP: Well, you might, in which case you should keep it if it's working and you have room for it and it's not out in the middle of your living room. If you're not using it but you might someday, that's something you might have in areas where things are properly stored.

TMA: How do you draw lines between what should be kept and what should be discarded?

MP: Relative to what you're making room in your life for! If it's apropos to the life you're really leading and you're really headed toward, then by all means, keep it. It's a truth-telling process in that way, and therefore taps into the spiritual aspect of one's life; you know, what is your truth? Scrutinize whether or not that in fact is something that will be useful to you, or whether it's seen its better day. And if it's seen its better day, then send it to another destination outside of your home, whether it's having a garage sale or giving it to a thrift store or passing it along to a friend or relative or donating it somewhere where it will have life. The whole thing about clutter and having it in your environment is that it's lifeless. You want to bring your environment alive. Stuff has energy and it has memory.

TMA: That's what I was going to ask you next. How does this relate to mementos, things from when you were a kid?

MP: I think there's a place for memorabilia in your environment. A place where it can be appreciated and shared and not obstruct your forward movement. You know, to think through its place in your life and put it in its proper place, which may be the past. And it may be contained in a scrapbook, an album, a treasure chest. In some way, you can creatively address it so it isn't an obstruction. Most of all, it can give you pleasure and be shared with others. But if it's out all over the place, and it's scrambling your life at the moment, then it's a bad memory, not a good one. You want to maintain the status of a good memory. You don't have to keep everything regarding every part . . . of every moment . . . of every stage . . . of your life. It's already ingrained in the fiber of your soul.

Be discerning. One of the things that's so great about clutter cleaning is it can train you in ways that are beneficial to all aspects of your life . . . and discernment is a good quality to have. Not only can it relate to your clutter, it can relate to every aspect of your life -- what you're doing in your job, what you're doing in your relationships, what you're doing with your time. As our choices, our options of what we can be doing with our lives keep growing, I think at the same time we have to be more and more discerning. That discernment will give you power in your life.

TMA: Having discernment is definitely a positive thing. Just this last weekend, I went through all my clothes and got rid of everything I'm not going to wear anymore. Didn't leave me with a whole lot, and that was a good thing. I enjoyed doing it and it felt good, and now I have room for things that I do want to have. But -- I've got a basement full of my kids' toys that they've outgrown. And that's very difficult.

MP: Toys that they've outgrown should be bundled and given to or sold to other children.

TMA: Oh yeah, I agree with that, intellectually. But then you go downstairs and look at them.

MP: That's another thing about clutter cleaning that moves it from the mundane to the sublime -- to get your intellect and your activities and what's going on with your life connected to reality. To make what you want in your life more real. If what you want is to let go of those toys -- and your actions aren't a match coordinated with your desire . . . that's the opportunity of clutter cleaning: desire and action get connected. To make your imagining and envisioning a match for what you're actually doing and having and being. It's a good training ground to have your life be that way, and it's one of the easiest areas in which to train yourself.

Just like if you're saying gee, I want to be twenty-five pounds less and you're eating chocolate cake every night, your actions are not a match for the fulfillment of your vision. So the challenge becomes what do you need to do in order to get to work on having that be a match? If you want to live in Seattle and you're living in Muncie, what steps do you need to be taking in order to have how and where you're living be a match for what you want? So it's a training ground for bigger things like that. That's how come I don't go by the "a place for everything, everything in its place" frame of thinking about clutter cleaning. It's "a path for everything, and everything on its path." You want to start getting life going in the direction you're headed, and so goes your stuff in the direction you're headed. If it's not going to grease the way for that, then it doesn't belong there.

TMA: Now what about the aspect of this: When you give something up, something else, presumably better, takes its place.

MP: Well something else will take its place. One of the things that oftentimes prevents people from even starting to clean their clutter is that they can sense their life is going to change and open up to something new. Something new goes along with something being unknown. And that can scare people. The notion that they're creating empty space and they're opening up to a new frontier which is unknown oftentimes breeds fear. That can stop people from the get-go from cleaning their clutter.

I think people should rest assured that the universal law is that empty space does get filled. So it will get filled, and that should give you some ease. Don't worry, your space isn't going to stay empty for long; it will get filled. Now in order for it to not be filled with more garbage, then the training that you get about discernment in clutter cleaning will come into play. You'll be able to say this is or is not appropriate for the direction I'm headed, and you can make choices as things come up.

I find that when you have a clear space and you're not aimless, there's more synchronicity. The right things happen at the right times and things that come in are perfect for what you need right then. The glory of clutter cleaning is there will be greater synchronicity. Buses will come on time, phone calls will come just when they should, letters will arrive at just the right moment, opportunities will present themselves -- and as they do, you can greet it with a sensitivity and a clarity that the clutter masks, and you can welcome it in or you can gracefully decline.

TMA: What about some of the more spiritual aspects of this?

MP: Well, I'm not a yoga master and I'm not a meditation guru, but I do resonate with those principles. The clutter cleaning principles resonate with the principles of yoga and meditation in that in meditation you're going for stillness. Presumably, the negative falls away and you're left in the presence of your true self and spiritual qualities like joy and bliss and goodness; it's a cleansing. Entering into a silent space in which there is a cleansing brings you to the greater good.

I think clutter cleaning is like meditation in motion, and I actually would recommend that clutter cleaning be treated that way. As you're going, you're constantly thinking through what you do and do not want and what you will and will not keep and how you want to integrate it into your environment, and then things come to rest. So there's less noise and busy-ness in the energy of the space, and it's more aligned with who you are. That's where the magic and the miracles come from.

TMA: The outer reflects the inner.

MP: When you and your world around you are aligned with one another, miracles happen. Things that otherwise wouldn't be available to you. There's less effort and will that you have to exert. Literally, you'll go more with the flow.

TMA: As the inner and the outer reflect each other, you can see how this works.

MP: Exactly. And that's really what I'm going for more than for the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval; that you are at one in your world. And that you build the base, which is within oneself, and with that base and that foundation intact, it can give you strength to extend that blissful feeling to your relationships with others . . . and beyond that to your workplace, and beyond that to your community. It can have far reaching effects. I'm not saying that it's easy all the time or that it's not sometimes painful; what I am saying is that building peace starting from within, starting with yourself, is worth the effort.

When you think of it, how many times do you call somebody and they don't call you back. Or somebody sends you a gift and time goes on and on and on and you don't extend some sort of thank you. It's not because people today have no compassion for life, but you get caught up in the swirl and the business of everyday life and forget the amenities that are appropriate to extend to other people. If you're free to do that again, matching your intention with what you actually do, that builds more happiness. I can't tell you how many people have a little black mark in their minds about others when simple courtesies aren't extended. I think that those courtesies help to build a better world. And if you're clutter free, you're more likely to be available to do those things, which are small, but important.

TMA: This clearly goes well beyond cleaning our desk tops and our closet floors.

MP: Right. But that's a good place to start. Then as you move through that and experience and learn the worth of it and your own worth, then yes, it can build a better quality of life.

TMA: You mentioned that you're going to have a book out in about a year?

MP: Published by HarperCollins. I'm in the process of writing it right now.

TMA: Does it have a title yet?

MP: It's called Lighten Up: Free Yourself From Clutter. I don't know whether that will remain the name when it's finally published, but that's the working title. The things we've been speaking about will be in the book. I'm excited about it. It's been an interesting journey.

Let me speak about what could be called the top principles of cleaning clutter. First, handling one item at a time, which may take breathing and slowing yourself down . . . and that's how it's meditative as well.

TMA: Slowing down could also keep you from throwing away something you don't want to lose.

MP: Yes, and it's part of being thoughtful. So, developing an ability to slow yourself down long enough to apply thoughtful consideration to each and every item. Then, handling one item at a time is a top principle. And putting like kinds of things together. For instance, if you empty your briefcase or totebag or pocketbook at the end of the day and you put all the papers from project A with project A, and all the papers with project B with project B, and all of your makeup together, and all of your pens and pencils together, and all of your change and money together, and all your receipts together, you're already on the path to de-cluttering. The next principle is that no stone is to be left unturned.

TMA: Ha! Look at everything.

MP: You will know that you have reached what I call "ground zero" when each and everything in your environment is there because you consciously and purposely put it there, and it's in support of your aims in life.

Once people address the principles and the perspectives on cleaning up papers and clothes, which are the primary kinds of clutter, they'll have a foundation that will enable them to improvise on all other kinds of clutter.

Fun is one of the things people don't associate with cleaning clutter, and by using the principles, they will see that instead of it being a burden, it can be fun. That relates to enlightenment also, because if there's any area in your life that you can't bring a sense of humor to, you're not enlightened in that area. If you can bring humor and spirit to the clutter cleaning, it will be fun.

Michelle Passoff ran her own public relations company in New York. Friends, then corporations, convinced her of the value to them of her methods of clearing away clutter. Now she is a clutter counselor, holding workshops that have a distinctive approach to high consciousness. In May, she will be conducting an all-day workshop at Oasis Center in Chicago.

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