The Shared Heart
New Dimensions of Relationship
Relationship and the Spiritual Path
While driving home from an invigorating walk at our favorite beach
(one that allows Charley and Ginger, our two young golden retrievers,
to run free), we were enjoying listening to a well-known spiritual
teacher on an audio tape - that is, until she brought up the topic
of relationships. We listened as she said, "The road to the
Self can only be taken alone. If you are with a partner, that
relationship will interfere with your true discovery of your Self."
We turned off the tape and thought to ourselves, "There's
that old message again." We reminisced how many times over
the years we have received that message from well-meaning friends
and teachers. One person insisted that our closeness was the very
thing blocking our spiritual progress. Somehow, these persistent
messages did not ring true in our souls, so the rebel in us both
set out to disprove them. We became convinced that we could find
a way to maintain our closeness while still evolving on our spiritual
journeys.
We had to shift from only looking into each other's eyes to
also looking into the eyes of the world.
So here we were, hearing the same message twenty years later.
And here we were, closer than ever before and, at the same time,
more deeply rooted to our spiritual path. Yet, to achieve this
closeness both within our relationship and to our own inner Selves,
we had to make an important shift in our relationship. This shift,
for which we had no role model, we now see was essential for the
deeper connection to our spiritual Selves. We had to shift from
only facing each other to also facing a mutual vision, a higher
purpose. We had to shift from only looking into each other's eyes
to also looking into the eyes of the world. This new vision was
inclusive of our previous vision. It didn't mean we stopped looking
into each other's eyes. Rather, it enlarged our vision, which
has served to actually deepen the closeness in our own relationship.
Our deepest vision is uniting our hearts as an act of service
to the world. By our loving one another, we feel we are giving
an important gift to the world. And by our continual striving
to integrate our relationship into our path of consciousness,
we feel we are providing a vital model for others.
Each year we consciously set aside time as a couple to crystallize
our vision of relationship and spirituality and then look for
ways to apply this vision to our daily lives, our work, and our
spiritual quest. We often take this time between our birthdays
in May, at which time we embark upon a shared vision quest in
nature.
Taking the time to connect with your common vision as a couple
could be the most important thing you do together. Feel the higher
purpose of your being together. Feel the gift you are bringing
to the world just by loving one another. This reflection will
not only bring you more love as a couple, but will also connect
you more deeply to your own heart and spiritual path.
Here are a few opportunities to study directly with Barry and
Joyce Vissell: February 1-8,1998-Hawaii Living From the Heart
Retreat.
Joyce and Barry Vissell have been a couple since 1964. A nurse
and medical doctor, their main interest since 1972 has been counseling
and teaching. As a result of the world-wide interest in their
books, The Shared Heart, Models of Love, Risk
To Be Healed, and Light in the Mirror: A New Way To Understand
Relationships, they travel internationally conducting talks
and workshops on relationship, parenting and healing. They are
the founders and directors of the Shared Heart Foundation, a non-profit
organization dedicated to the healing and integrity of individuals,
couples and families.
Call TOLL-FREE 1-800-766-0629 (locally 408-684-2299) or write
to the Shared Heart Foundation, P.O. Box 2140, Aptos, CA 95001,
for a free newsletter from Barry and Joyce, further information
on their books, tapes and training programs, or their schedule
of talks and workshops.
Return to This Month's Index
|