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ELEMENTS FOR TRANSFORMATION
by Jim Loftus |
 WILL RETURN NEXT MONTH |
Louise L. Hay is a metaphysical teacher and the bestselling author of 27 books, including You Can Heal Your Life, Empowering Women, and Letters to Louise. Since beginning her career as a Science of Mind minister in 1981, she has assisted thousands of people in discovering and using the full potential of their own creative powers for personal growth and self-healing. Louise's works have been translated into 25 different languages in 33 countries throughout the world.
Dear Louise,
It's a real pleasure for me to have found your column and to have a way to contact you after so many years of reading your books and listening to your tapes.
I am a 44-year-old single female with a degree in psychology and a job in a bank. My life has been difficult, as I lost sight in my right eye when I was four years old. I was 17 when an artificial eye was adapted for me. My father used to be an alcoholic, and I had a cold mother -- all these situations have made me very unhappy and have caused me to lose my self-confidence. In spite of it all, I love my parents and have forgiven them.
However, I have a very big problem speaking in public. I recently discovered that this could be a social phobia. I feel the problem becomes stronger and more resistant with time, in spite of my applying techniques such as meditation, affirmations, and the intent to change.
Louise, I really need help. This situation is very unsatisfying and sad for me. Would you please give me your opinion?
-- T.E., Mexico City
Dear T.E.,
If you want to drop the fear quickly, join Toastmasters or enroll in a Dale Carnegie course. Most cities have both groups. I am sure that Mexico City has its own version. These organizations employ trained professionals who have lots of tips and secrets to help you overcome your fears. And the people in these courses are a lot of fun to be with. In the meantime, affirm: I AM VERY COMFORTABLE BEING ME!
*****
Dear Louise,
Given the recent school shootings in our country, and hearing about the vicious bullying endured by the boy in the Santee, California, shooting, I find that this dredges up my own unhealed rage over being bullied as a teenager 35 years ago. It's disturbing when these poisonous emotions still flare up periodically.
I was a very sensitive kid whose self-confidence was damaged by the ridicule and name-calling. Even today I'm full of self-doubt and self-criticism. I often isolate myself, and have pretty much avoided love and romance.
I've discovered your wonderful tapes and books and have started the mental exercises in order to forgive the past hurts and release the sense of myself as damaged and full of faults.
Still, I wonder what your thoughts are about all of these recent shootings.
-- H.J., Sacramento, CA
Dear H.J.,
I see this as all part of the healing that needs to be done. Things often get worse before they get better. Bullying has always gone on; however, I do believe that it is escalating. Overworked two-parent wage earners, without the time or energy to instill consideration, kindness, and compassion in their children contribute to the problem.
And then, of course, there's television. Television is a teacher, and for many younger children, a babysitter. For most kids, the TV is on for three or four hours every day. Television teaches us -- and most unfortunately, teaches impressionable young minds -- that the way to react to frustration is to use violence. We glorify the violence in show after show on TV. Add to this the prevalence of handguns in many households, and we have explosive situations just waiting to happen.
Television has become a family member, and often an unruly, loudmouthed, violent one. And it will continue in this fashion unless we do something about it. Our young people need role models to look up to and emulate. Thank heavens there are now studies being done and committees being formed to correct this situation. Hold in your consciousness that the solution is being found.
When you were a child, you were already self-conscious and carried a huge "victim" sign that attracted bullying and abuse, as did the boy in Santee. I'm sorry you went through that stage and am thankful that you survived. It also means that you have much forgiveness work to do so that you can really love yourself. Do begin some counseling work; it will help enormously. Affirm: I FORGIVE MYSELF AND MOVE ON. I DEVELOP A POSITIVE, LOVING STATE OF MIND.
For a free catalog of books, audios, videos, and other products by Louise Hay and other Hay House authors, please call (800) 654-5126 or fax (800) 650-5115. If you would like Louise to answer your letter in this publication, address your letter to: Dear Louise Column, c/o Hay House, Inc., P.O. Box 5100, Carlsbad, CA 92018-5100. Please visit the Hay House Website at: hayhouse.com. (Letters used in this column may be edited for length and clarity.)
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