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After one of his early days in first grade, I asked our son how he was liking school. He told me it was OK, but he didn’t get enough alone time, and that he needed a lot of alone time. He missed the free afternoons he was used to in kindergarten. Being kind of a thoughtful kid, this wasn’t completely strange, just awfully sweet.

He was realizing what many of us don’t. We’re wired to spend some of our time alone. Alone time offers us the opportunity to calm down, to regroup, and to gain perspective. Being by ourselves let’s us be who we are, uninfluenced by the energy of other people and the distraction of outer activity. We don’t have to be on when we’re by ourselves. Solitude can be used to look beyond our everyday concerns to our larger reality, and can give us the space for clarity, gratitude and forgiveness. Often it is during a time of solitary musing that solutions to confounding challenges emerge.

I doubt that most of us get enough alone time. How can we when so many of us operate at breakneck speed every day? From morning to night our days are filled with busyness. Because of cell phones, we’re always on call, and the internet offers ever more opportunities to interact with others even when we’re physically alone. It’s hard to be outside our homes and not be surrounded by people.

Some of us are sorely uncomfortable when faced with a period of solitude. Have you ever known someone who left things at your house so they would have a ready excuse to drop by when they needed company? Many of us must be afraid to be alone for even a minute, judging by the number of people we see chatting away while driving, shopping, and even dining in restaurants.

Given that most of us don’t give our selves time to reflect and unwind, I worry about the kids we’re raising. Most parents feel they’re doing their kids a favor by keeping them safe and occupied every minute. How much unstructured alone time does the average child get? And if they get some, have we taught them what to do with it?

This world offers a dizzying array of non-stop stimulation. The current political and international situations, covered 24/7, press on us unrelentingly. Careers, personal relationships, and family obligations, fulfilling as they may be, take their toll. Overwhelmed, we find ourselves reacting day after day to the things that confront us. We need to make some time and space available, regularly, to get away from it all, and to become reacquainted with ourselves. Intentionally taking time for peace and solitude, however brief, fills our energetic reservoirs and provides us with resources we can calmly draw from to meet our daily demands. Spending quality time with ourselves gives us the ability to act more gracefully in the company of others.